Apparently, I'm (un)dead!

My wife and I are in the process of refinancing our mortgage. This is a slow process involving a bunch of paper. We don’t have a subprime loan or anything similar but are taking advantage of an act of congress and interest rates below 5% to save some money.

In and of itself, this isn’t terribly interesting to anyone but me and her. The interesting part to others is that when my loan officer did my credit check, he only got reports back from two of the three credit agencies. It turns out that Equifax says that I am dead. Who knew? It might explain my fascination with zombies.

The loan officer said it doesn’t hurt my credit score for the refinancing on my home since the other two credit agencies say that I’m alive. I guess majority rules here and as long as one of the others doesn’t decide that I am dead too, I’ll be fine for the loan (This is my guess, not a statement from the officer…).

The best guess is that this report of my untimely demise is fallout from the death of my father in January, 2006. He and I have the same full name, except I am the third and he is junior. I handled his estate following his death as his only child. After a little digging, my loan officer found that Citibank is reporting to credit agencies that I closed a credit card with them in early 2006 (after paying the bill off!) with a report that I was deceased. In actuality, I paid off my dad’s bills, including a Citibank credit card, while informing all parties that he was dead. I also had all of his mail forwarded to my home address. It appears that Citibank either didn’t include his social security number in their report to Equifax when they said his account was closed or that, perhaps, they simply used his name and his (my) later address.

In any case, I’m halfway expecting this to turn into some sort of kafkaesques nightmare as I try to prove to a bureaucratic inhuman monstrosity (like Cthulhu but less cuddly) that I am not dead. For extra bonus points, I can try to get items from my dad’s credit history removed from mine, since he and I have apparently comingled into a composite being that is both dead and alive, which is the classic definition of the undead.